It was fun to let her pick out colors and listened to her stream-of-consciousness-banter while I sewed and even better to see her face afterward. It wasn’t a perfect ob, by far- it was the first time I’d done it at all, actually. But- she wanted it to “look like a girl” despite its androgynous skeleton costume. (and the hood to the costume was ripped, so I was already sewing it, anyhow) In lieu of sharpening my vulva-likeness-on-skeleton-costumed-teddy-bear embroidering skills and getting into a what-makes-a-girl-a-girl conversation during her short stay (and possibly permanently alter something her birth mama has going on) I opted for eyelashes. Easy, peasy- happy kidlet. Win: win.
- My doppelganger soul sister, Jes. I’ve never met someone I’ve had so much in common with physically, as well as mentally and even spiritually, too. Though we’ve gotten to hang out together perhaps less than ten times, it hardly seems possible! She hosted a part for Sk8den today (oh- it helps that they have two bowls to skate in their backyard…) and made a skateboard shaped cake with donut wheels! Megarad. She listens with an open ear and heart, understands what the hell I’m talking about and doesn’t judge me or anyone else because of what I say. SO much gratitude for Jes today. ♥
- Laughing. I really laughed today- both at the party with Jess and Colleen, another uberawesome mama- and with my pseudo-cousin’s girlfriend when we saw them later in the day. It was good for the spirit, good for the heart. Kid laugh ALL the time. Adults- not so much. Laughter is the best medicine, they say- good thing, because that’s what i can afford! (That’s only kind of funny, FYI)
- Embroidering. Apparently, my mom used to do it for a while, too- at least, that’s what my grandma said when she saw the pillowcase I made for my son’s 11th birthday. I really like it for a lot of reasons- I like seeing the pattern develop, the rhythm of moving the needle in and out and I also like being able to spend time on something to make it more aesthetic and personal as a lasting and individual piece of love I can give- and again, afford. Christmas is coming- guess what everyone’s getting!
- A working heater. In addition to the back windows no longer rolling down and the A/C not working, now the entire fan unit in my car has stopped working. This is especially apparent in the days and nights lately where it has been literally freezing out. It is COLD. There’s a homeless man who lays out his sleeping bag every night near the park where we live. He must be cold. I feel like an asshole for whining about the heater in my car and having to bundle up. I’m grateful to at least have a working heater to come home to.
- All of the Veterans who helped shape America. I love my freedoms- I wish that Americans of all races, abilities, sexes and sexual orientations shared the same ones I do, even as a low-income family. I acknowledge my status as a middle-class (maybe enen low-income, but never low-class. I dink wine from bottles, not boxes! Well, mostly. Eh, nevermind, let’s move on…) citizen in a first world country. Those rights were given to me by years of blood, sweat, tears & dedication of hundreds of thousands of men and women. I have been a military wife with a husband overseas– it is a constant pit in your stomach, no matter which part of duty performed or where, to have a loved one at war- especially a war in which one is vehemently opposed to, but I digress. I am grateful and am trying to utilize it daily.
After all…
“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” -John Fitzgerald Kennedy
So, uh… here’s your cue: